Monday, May 29, 2017

Ridley Scott Movies Ranked



A director most well-known for his impressive and atmospheric cinematography (which seems to be copied ad nauseam nowadays, even he has been reduced to mostly digital mockeries of his own style).  There are actually only a few greats on here; half of these movies are rather middling.  I’ve heard Alien: Covenant is decent but missable.  I don’t really feel like dragging my big, fat dragon butt to the theater to see it anyway. 



17. Robin Hood
2010
**********
Boring garbage.  I find it hard to accept any version of Robin Hood in which he’s not an anthropomorphic fox, but this movie completely misses the fun, swashbuckling point of the legend.  The only good parts were this scene and a beautiful end credits sequence.  Originally there was a much more interesting premise that was scrapped, and it was clear they had no real idea what else to do. 
 



16. Prometheus
2012
**********
This movie may have great effects and cinematograpy, but it combined insufferable pretentiousness with B-movie stupidity.  David (Michael Fassbender) is the only character whose motivations and actions make sense.  He’s like the only person in the movie.  The other characters are like really dumb animals.  At least it wasn't boring like Robin Hood.






15. Kingdom of Heaven
2005
**********
Inaccurate and muddled in its motivations.  I’ve heard the Director’s Cut is much better, but I don’t have enough interest to check it out.







14. Thelma and Louise
1991
**********
It has a good cast and some amusing moments, but unfortunately the “feminist” story is about to women who make a mistake and moronically dig their hole deeper by runing away from the authorities.  It also dragged a bit.
  




 

13. Hannibal
2001
**********
Not as bad as everybody says, but not exactly a classic.




 



12. Body of Lies
2008
**********
One of those bland movies that mistakes aimless cynicism for profundity.


 




11. American Gangster
2007
**********
Pretty decent movie, but not much to write home about.
  

 






10. Black Rain
1989
**********
It’s enjoyable enough for Ridley Scott’s amazing cinematography.  It looks like a real-world version of Blade Runner.  Despite the visuals, it’s pretty much a rigidly formulaic and predictable cowboy cop movie that kinda drags on.






 
9. Legend
1985
**********
It may not have the best story or writing, but I think this is the best-looking fantasy movie I’ve seen.  The villain is well played by Tim Curry, even though he’s a bit of a dumbass, and it has some good, whimsical side characters, like the dwarves and Honeythorn Gump.  The protagonists are a bit bland, and the move drags quite a bit.






8. All the Invisible Children: Jonathan
2005
**********
Scott’s contribution to this anthology about child exploitation is intriguingly symbolic and abstract.

 





7. The Counselor
2013
**********
An interesting collaboration between the director and Cormac McCarthyl  Although it does get a bit smutty at times, it’s a pretty underrated movie.
 






6. The Martian
2015
**********
A good, funny movie with an optimistic portrayal of space exploration.  Matt Damon is lovably smarmy, and the comic relief really helps make the movie fun.  I’m not sure I can remove Scott from this list, though.  The film is visually generic and has little directorial vision.  It mostly seemed like a competent execution of a good script with a solid cast (think Brett Ratner and Red Dragon).





 
5. The Duellists
1977
**********
Good story, good humor and amazing cinematography.  This movie deserves credit for being Ridley Scott’s directorial debut.  Too bad it’s relatively forgotten.  Some directorial debuts are deservedly forgotten (The Coens’ Blood Simple), but this one needs some attention.



 


4. Black Hawk Down
2001
**********
Saving Private Ryan set a new standard for war movies, and this film does a great job following up without a contrived plot.  There are a couple moments that bug the shit out of me, though.  There’s one amazingly dramatic moment from the event revolving around the first confirmed American KIA.  Accounts refer to all this chaotic background chatter that made communications hard, but when that one guy says, “He’s dead”…DEAD SILENCE.  Despite being lucky enough to have this given to them on a silver platter, they still figured out away to mess it up.  I also heard one account describing a Little Bird pilot flying his helicopter with one hand and shooting at people with an MP5 with another; I didn’t know how that didn’t make the cut.



3. Gladiator
2000
**********
This modern-day Ben-Hur is Scott at his best.  It has great acting, great characters, visceral action, beautiful cinematography and one of the best movie scores I’ve ever heard.  Probably inspired a few swords and sandals action movies, but none of them came close to being as good.  One of the few Best Picture winners in recent years that actually deserved it.  There seems to be a baffling backlash against this movie recently.  I guess some people just don't like awesomeness.






2. Alien
1979
**********
Amazing visuals and suspense.  It works as a horror movie because the actions of most of the characters make sense.  Still effective even if you know the twist.







1982
**********
With its dark atmosphere, great score, complex storytelling and amazing visuals, this is one of the best sci-fi movies ever made and my second favorite movie.  The ultimate cyberpunk film.  Unfortunately the original theatrical version had laughably cheesy pseudo-noir narration from Harrison Ford, but this has been fixed by the Director’s Cut and subsequent editions.









Average: 6.5


BONUS ROUND!
Movies Ranked by Visual Style

17. Thelma and Louise
16. American Gangster
15. Body of Lies
14. The Martian
13. The Counselor
12. All the Invisible Children: Jonathan 
11. Hannibal
10. Kingdom of Heaven
9. Robin Hood
8. Black Hawk Down
7. Prometheus
6. The Duellists
5. Gladiator
4. Black Rain
3. Alien
2. Legend
1. Blade Runner
 

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