The Bonfire of the Vanities
1990
D: Brian DePalma
**********
This film had expectations to live up to, to say the least. Tom Wolfe’s 1987 classic is a masterpiece of narrative and political commentary, demonstrating that the woke movement was always lurking in the shadows of modern society before it blew up around 2008, and naturally the movie adaptation was destined to fall short of its expectations. Indeed, The Bonfire of the Vanities was panned upon its release, and there’s even a famous TCM podcast covering its infamously hectic production. However, if not for one insufferably bad performance, I would indulge in an instinct for soft contrarianism by asserting that it was a decent movie whose worst crime was not being as good as a great book. This movie also manages to be a case study in both the weakness and strengths of cinema as a medium.
The story involves millionaire bond trader Sherman McCoy who while, meeting with his mistress Maria Ruskin, is cornered by a couple of thugs in the ghetto while driving. In a scene that foreshadows the willful legal blind spot toward the dilemma faced by motorists when they are being mobbed in the their cars, McCoy evasively drives off and accidentally checks one with the rear corner of his Mercedes, rendering him somewhat less scholarly than he was before. Jaded liberal lawyer Larry Kramer, itching for the ideological prestige of prosecuting the “Great White Defendant,” leads a trumped-up show trial against him. It was actually impressive that Hollywood was willing to make such a movie, let a lone stay mostly faithful to its themes.
The most transparently controversial aspect of the movie was its casting. Sherman McCoy, despite his handsomeness and physicality, is a sleazy, flawed, individualistic, and morally weak man who lacks his self-assigned fortitude. Such a role would be perfect for Brad Pitt or George Clooney, but our creators for some stupid reason decided to cast Tom Hanks, who is practically lovability personified. The rationale for this is that they wanted people to see the human side of Sherman McCoy, as if that’s not the entire job of character actors: to act. Still, this is Late 80’s Tom Hanks, and he is competent and fun.
The other seemingly random choice was Bruce Willis as Peter Fallow. Many criticized the casting of an American for a role that was supposed to emphasize the perspective of an outsider, but the character works nonetheless, and Willis fits, though this choice is still questionable considering how difficult he was known to be. Considering that Fallow was based on Christopher Hitchens, it would have made the movie drastically more entertaining if they knew enough about Roger Allam to cast him.
Despite these false alarms, it was Melanie Griffith as Maria Ruskin who rescues the film from the injustice of being unfairly maligned. Her performance is not just bad, it is irritating on a visceral, primal level, with the native New Yorker’s donning the worst fake Southern accent this side of Rian Johnson’s using some British actor for this purpose just for the sake of obnoxiousness while being praised as some bold auteur for doing so. It reminds me of Robert Duvall’s assertion that men should line the border of the South with shotguns to prevent Hollywood types from coming in unless they know what they’re doing. Griffith lost the Razzie Award to Bo Derek' performance in some forgotten piece by the name of Ghosts Can’t Do It, which I cannot imagine possibly being any worse. Then again, the Razzies are full of shit. I assert that Griffith’s performance is the one thing that single-handedly ruins this otherwise decent movie.
The rest of the cast is solid. Saul Rubinek plays Larry Jed Kramer, who is reimagined as a relatively inexperienced lawyer. Rubinik is solid as a seemingly nice young man who is quickly corrupted by temptation, reflecting good range from someone who believably played a Star Trek character so monstrous he pushed Data to his breaking point. Reflecting the weaknesses of the medium in establishing backstory, Kramer’s experiences with “pieces of shit” (insignificant, banal black-on-black crimes that usually get settled) and his desire for the Great White Defendant cannot be established through internal text, so instead he gets the concepts spoon-fed to him in a forced exposition dump from Judge Leonard White (Morgan Freeman).
Freeman is good in this movie, although the desire to cast him imposed some logistical difficulties as it did with Bruce Willis, although these difficulties had more to do with conflicting stage schedules than being an asshole. It also caused some controversy with the local Jewish community since the judge in the book was a Jewish hero who balanced out a Jewish villain. To be fair, the producers also would have had to choose that or the same problem with black characters, so you could hardly blame them for being put into that position. Then again there were two Jewish villains including the corrupt DA (F. Murray Abraham), and they decided to balance out the black cast.
Yeah, they really did reap the whirlwind. I can see why this movie didn't do well.
Wolfe would no doubt be amused by this.
The best cast member is Kim Catrall, who plays Sherman’s frustrated wife Judy. Unfortunately, her role is diminished later in the plot, but she is excellent. If you want a good impression of how much of a joke the Razzies are, they nominated her for this. That has got to be one of the most brutal, graphic onscreen kills I’ve ever seen in a movie: I’m not even sure how it got away with a mere R-Rating.
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| Sherman's spirit observing his own unrecognizably dismembered corpse lying in a pool of blood and viscera |
Resident Al Sharpton parody Reverend Baker is also well played by John Hancock, who must have been pretty old when this movie was made. He also delivers an unexpected killing blow with impeccable timing worthy of an Angel Dust-style redraw. Other cast members include Kevin Dunn, Clifton James, Donald Moffat, Geraldo Rivera as himself, and Kirsten Dunst as the McCoy’s daughter Campbell.
The movie has its stylistic strengths, even though the limitations of the medium force it to delete some context (including my favorite moment), but DePalma collaborated with veteran cinematographer Vilmos Zsigmond to create some memorable scenes, the most memorable one’s being the movie’s impressive opening tracking shot. The set design in the ghetto is also interestingly stylized. One scene that stands out as a good demonstration of the strengths of cinema vs. literature is the introduction of the Rev. Bacon. The book takes the time to establish his corrupt dealings, and the movie pragmatically opts instead to demonstrate his comical hypocrisy by shooting him at a low angle with bombastic gospel music, ranting conceitedly as Kramer addresses him in bemused deference. The movie has its moments of humor and sticks to the themes of the book faithfully enough even if is incomplete. I often found myself thinking that this movie actually isn’t too bad, and then another Melanie Griffith scene happens.
One rather interesting case of behind-the-scenes difficulties is the absolutely unnecessary trouble they went through to get one establishing shot of the Concorde’s landing (even IMPDb can't help but comment on it). There are times in which the extra effort put in pays off on the screen but sometimes the opposite happens. Examples include the amount of money poured into the CGI final battle in TROS and Kubrick’s insistence that the table be the exact right shade of green in black-and-white movie Dr. Strangelove. They spent roughly $80,000 for location rights and the timing in order to capture the plane’s landing in front of a sunset. Granted, it’s a pretty shot, but the intent was to establish that Maria was a spoiled gold digger by demonstrating that she was flying in the Concorde. However, there is a difference between a shot that says “This is the Concorde” and a shot that says “This is a plane landing, and that plane happens to be the Concorde.” The former would have been a close-up in which the Concorde dominates the frame for emphasis. One would wonder why they did not feel confident with how convincing it would be to circumvent the paperwork with a miniature effect, but keep in mind this movie was made in 1990, and Star Wars hadn’t come out yet.
A questionable story choice was Judge White’s corny decency speech, which was actually included in the original newspaper releases of the book. For obvious reasons Wolfe excised it from the official novel versions, but Hollywood dug it up for prosperity. There is not further comment on friend of Sherman's "victim" in the movie: he simply drops the kid off at the hospital and disappears. In the book we get further commentary when his kindergarten-level painting in jail impresses liberal social workers, not a surprising thing from Wolfe. The death of Maria's husband (Alan King) is perfunctory, substantially less comical and drawn-out than in the book, though it would have been amusing to watch on screen. The resolution to the story is also too rushed and clear-cut. Sherman is bailed out from legal trouble by exposing the illegal means with which he is entrapped, but in the book this does not save him from further frivolous legal harassment. Other annoying moments include the movie’s predictable, hackish concluding line and this shot.
Bonfire of the Vanities was doomed to live under that shadow of the book, but if not for one annoying character, it would have been a movie worth giving a chance. It may still be for some of its strengths, provided you keep the fast forward button handy.
QUOTES
PETER FALLOW: Our hero, Sherman McCoy, was about to make a simple phone call. But despite the existence of eleven telephones and seven different lines in fourteen rooms of his sixteen-million-plus dollar apartment, this was a phone call he could not make at home.
SHERMAN: I want you to meet Aubrey Buffing.
JUDY: Who?
SHERMAN: Aubry Buffing. The poet. He's on the short list for the Nobel Prize, he has AIDS, you'll love him!
SHERMAN: Well, a bond is a way of lending people money. Now let's say you wanna build a road or a hospital, and you need a lot of money, but what you do is you issue a bond.
CAMPBELL: Do you build roads?
[Judy laughs contemptuously]
SHERMAN: Oh no, no, no. I don't actually build them.
MR. McCOY: I think you're in over your head.
JUDY: Oh here, let me try. [assumes deliberate motherly tone] Darling, Daddy doesn't really build roads or hospitals or, anything, really. [looks at Sherman, who realizes he's screwed] Daddy just handles the bonds with the people who raise the money.
CAMPBELL: That's what he said, bonds.
JUDY: Yes! Now just imagine that a bond is a slice of cake. [increases playful tone] Now, you didn't bake that cake...every time you hand a slice of that cake to somebody else, a little bit comes off. [looks back at Sherman] Little...crumbs fall off.
SHERMAN: [laughing uncomfortably] Really? Crumbs, huh?
JUDY: You are allowed to keep those crumbs.
MR. McCOY: Many a man has sold his soul for those little crumbs.
JUDY: YES, AND THAT'S WHAT DADDY DOES. Daddy passes somebody else's cake around and picked up all of the crumbs. But you have to imagine a lot of crumbs. [starts tickling Campbell] And a great, big golden cake. And Daddy and a lot of golden little crumbs. You have to imagine Daddy running around picking up every little golden crumb he can get his hands on. And that's what Daddy does.
SHERMAN: Well, you can call them crumbs if you want to-
JUDY: I am doing the best...I can. Excuse me. [puts own shades and leaves]
REV. BACON: Honesty has nothing to do with this Mr. Fallon. Heh, this is show business! I've never known the two to go hand in hand.
PETER FALLOW: Well, neither have I, and I'm supposed to be some kind of journalist up here.
REV. BACON: No, you're supposed to be a drunk. That's what I've been told.
DA Weiss: We are gonna prove to these black motherfuckers...pardon my language, Howard, we are going to prove to these n-----s that this administration loves them! No matter what it takes. I'm no racist hymie! By November they are going to be thinking of me as the first black district attorney of Bronx County.
ED RIFKIN: Good doesn't really apply at Ruppert High. They're either cooperative or life-threatening.
JUDGE WHITE: THE COURT DIRECTS YOU TO SHUT UP.
SPECIAL: CASTING COUCH
Michael Fassbender as Sherman McCoy
Roger Allam as Peter Fallow
Adam Driver as Larry Kramer
Saul Rubinek as the Judge
