G.I. Joe: Retaliation
2013
D: Jon M. Chu
**********
Pros: Some improved costume design, Ray Stevenson, Walton Goggins
Cons: Anticlimactic plot, Fridge logic, Bland characters, Blander setting
In the wake of the negative reaction to G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra, the studio decided to take the time to do damage control on the sequel. Apparently, half the cast backed out, as well. Four years later (partially due to a misguided attempt to adapt the movie to 3-D), G.I Joe Retaliation was released under director Jon M. Chu, who had previously been known primarily for directing two Step Up sequels and a Justin Bieber documentary.
Retaliation begins with a rushed montage of exposition which glosses over the “Nanomite Wars” with MARS as a past event and then without further explanation introduces us to a more mundane setting. No more sonic weapons reminiscent of COBRA’s blue lasers, no more futuristic uniforms and vehicles, no more nanomites and all the potential intrigue that comes with them: just military fatigues and firearms. People think this is an improvement over Rise of Cobra for some reason.
Eschewing camp and genre tropes in favor of a more “mature” mundane setting worked in many movies such as Casino Royale and the Dark Knight trilogy, but there’s the subtle trick involved in this trend in that when you do that you actually have to make the movies good. If you eliminate all these over-the-top gonzo trappings without replacing them with smarter writing, all you did was just make the franchise less fun.
The movie begins optimistically nonetheless. We establish that Duke (Channing Tatum) and Roadblock (The Rock) are the two head soldiers in charge of G.I. Joe. After some brief action to demonstrate that they’re badass, the movie takes the time to show the two interacting in their natural environment and establish that they have an amusing natural chemistry (that’s a good thing, E-Rod). Roadblock ends up filling the role far better than Marlon’ Wayans’ suspiciously absent Ripcord. Okay, so it seems that we have two likable, fun protagonists to lead our fun popcorn movie to keep it entertaining.
Duke is unceremoniously killed during an airstrike ordered by Zartan, the remnant of the last movie’s nanomite lore, who is still disguised as the US President (Jonathan Pryce, with occasional flashes of Arnold Vosloo as Zartan’s true form). As with the previous movie, this fails to explore the terrible social implications. Once Zartan is revealed at the end, there is little acknowledgment of the mass paranoia caused by the idea that anyone in government can be replaced with a changeling. As if the undeserved damage to the real president's career is not enough, Zartan actually brags to the poor guy about banging his wife.
The hijacked US government has replaced G.I. Joe, now branded as traitors, with a new elite force called COBRA, ignoring the slight but observable use of such branding by the villains in the previous film. COBRA operatives sport bland uniforms only half-heartedly based on the classic ones, reflective of the movie’s overall lack of style.
Forced to go into hiding, Roadblock, Flint (D.J. Cotrona) and Lady Jaye (Adrianne Palicki) seek help from retired G.I. Joe founder Gen. Joe Colton (Bruce Willis), who for some reason has been ignored by Zartan and Co. Aside from some slight ship-teasing, Flint and Lady Jaye are as bland as you could possibly imagine. Unsurprisingly, Bruce Willis sleep-walks through the movie like most of the movie as he has through many such lesser works that have cast him for mere name recognition, and this results in some of the most awkward attempts at comic relief I have ever seen. Colton’s moderate misogyny butts heads with the mild girlboss motivation that passes for character development from Lady Jaye, but he eventually grows to respect her by the end of the movie, which is adorable.
Meanwhile Cobra Commander (Luke Bracey, voiced by Robert Baker), Storm Shadow (Lee Byung-Hun), and Destro are being imprisoned in a secret underground bunker overseen by Warden Nigel James (Walton Goggins). They are kept in a helpless stasis that seems cruel even for villains such as them. They are rescued by Firefly (Ray Stevenson). Presumbably because Christopher Eccleston declined to renew his contract, Destro is left to die in the exploding prison, which is a shame because this is a missed opportunity to atone for how awkwardly miscast he was. Admittedly there is an interesting character moment in which Cobra Commander takes off the mirror-like mask from his stasis suit, decides he likes it, and puts it back on, inspiring the new design of his new costume.
Cobra Commander’s costume is one of the few improvements in the movie. I’m not so sure about the blended version of the classic visor/helmet design, but he looks cool. Unfortunately, his voice is a generic low pitch; if they were going to have a dub, they should have gone with Charlie Adler, who does a great Cobra Commander voice. Snake-Eyes’ (Ray Park) costume was also an improvement, creative but faithful.
Unfortunately, he’s a pretty flat character, especially with his former friend Duke’s being killed off; no more personal matters. He’s also pretty passive: all he does is get busted out of prison by his loyal subordinates and then proceeds to do nothing despite having been cool in the last movie (see also: Solomon Lane in Mission: Impossible – Fallout). It’s too bad Joseph Gordon-Levitt didn’t reprise his role because he was actually great. I suppose after Inception, he felt he didn’t have to be in such movies any more. Haven’t heard much from him in a while, though.
Storm-Shadow is injured in the prison breakout and sent to a mountain retreat to heal, only to be captured by Snake-Eyes and Jinx (Elodie Yung). He presented before the Blind Master (The RZA) in order to answer for his murder of the Hard Master. Storm-Shadow quickly proves his innocence in a way that could have been done years ago. Naturally this makes everyone present forgive him for joining a murderous terrorist organization bent on world domination, and he joins the good guys free of charge. For this reason, I’ve never really bought him as an honorable villain, and I kind of agree with Resolute for having none of that.
All the good guys unite in Colson’s house. In an amusing moment, Storm-Shadow declines a firearm while Snake-Eyes lovingly handles to submachine guns; I unironically like it when the less ambiguous hero is the gun guy. Colson lends Roadblock a Ripsaw tank in which he gets in a token fight with H.I.S.S. tanks while President Zartan blows up London with a superweapon. Storm-Shadow kills Zartan (who turns out to be the Hard Master’s true killer), Firefly dies tragically, and Cobra Commander escapes.
The movie ends with Duke’s funeral, in which Colson gifts Roadblock with a 1911 (a Boomer downgrade from the Joes’ standard issue Glock 21’s) for killing COBRA Commander. Roadblock then fires the pistol up in the air with the 21-gun salute which, unless the gun has been temporarily modified to cycle blanks, has sent a few live rounds downrange.
G.I. Joe: Retaliation isn’t boring, but it’s not particularly good. Characterization is lacking, and Roadlbock isn’t even mentioned to be a gourmet chef!. Loathe am I to admit it, E-Rod was right that Cobra Commander is pointlessly passive while Firefly and the Warden are redeeming features. Duke’s death is inappropriately subversive for such an unpretentious movie and renders it less entertaining.
The movie owes more to the comic than the cartoon, which I am more nostalgic for. The action is a mixed bag; you know the director lacks vision when the movie has both shakycam and Snyderism. Henry Jackman’s score is a mildly atmospheric improvement. Retaliation also stars Matt Gerald, Joseph Mazello, and James Carville as himself.
