My Favorite MLP:FIM Songs

One thing I love about this show is that it has so many great songs.  Not just canon ones, but there are also some great fan works, as well.  Here are my personal favorites.

16.  Ballad of the Crystal Empire (The Mane Six)
Doesn't quite capture the urgency of the situation, but it's a nice song.

15. Discord (Eurobeat Brony)

What better way to demonstrate the agony of being controlled by Discord than to sing a dance mix?

14. BBBFF (Twilight Sparkle)

A heartfelt piece about the connection Twilight has with her brother.  I love how cute filly Twilight looks as she’s prancing around joyfully.  The reprise (sung after her brother disowns her) is pretty sad.

13. Cutie Mark Crusading (Instrumental)

A memorable, but unobtrusive, muzak piece that many bronies have used as background music.

12. The Failure Song (Twilight Sparkle)

This misleadingly titled song is actually rather pretty.  The animation is great and I love the flow at 1:17, but the song is short we don't really hear that motif again.

11. Deceptive Cadence (Arvianth)A very solid classical theme from this fan.

10. Stop the Bats (Applejack, Fluttershy, et al.)

"Bats" was the first worthwhile episode of the new season, and partially because of this song.

9. Winter Wrap Up (Citizens of Ponyville)

A very catchy and enjoyable song with a slight country quality.  I believe “Winter Wrap Up” is one of the best episodes of the series, and this song is one of the reasons why.  Hey, wait, how come Fluttershy's not in that intro?

8. The Caves Beneath Canterlot (Instrumental)

This ominous, ambient score unfortunately has a lot of dialogue over it, but it’s one of the best scoring moments in the show.   

7. My Little Pony Theme Song (Italian Version)
It's...so...much....better than ours...it's...just epic.

6. Babs Seed (Cutie Mark Crusaders)

I confess that there are some catchy, girly pop songs I like.  The show already sank to the level of bad pop music in "Canterlot Wedding" and did the first genuinely awful song in the series.  However, I love this newer song.  It's catchy, and I love how the animation is synced with the beat.  Dear Gosh, Sweetie Bell looks so damn cute the way she's holding her smoothie.  

5. The Cutie Mark Crusaders Theme (Cutie Mark Crusaders)

One of the great moments of the show is the CMC’s power ballad about the trials and tribulations of finding a cutie mark.  The slapstick is good, and the song is genuinely fun to listen to.  I find Applebloom’s impressionistic dancing particularly funny.  If you think Scootaloo’s singing isn’t so bad, listen to the isolated version of it.

4. This Day Aria (Princess Cadance/Queen Chrysalis)

You might catch some motifs from some Alan Menken Disney songs, but this is still a great song.  The show’s first great villain song.  Britt McKillip is quite a singer.

3. Nightmare Night (Wooden Toaster)

Wooden Toaster is a bit of a celebrity in the brony community for his fan songs.  This song actually has quite a good melody.

2. The Smile Song (Pinkie Pie)

It's about ponies smiling, and it's seriously one of the best songs I've ever heard.  Another example of how this show can take an idea that's ridiculously schmaltzy and make it awesome.  I love how one pony starts singing about smiling, and everyone in town decides they want a piece of that shit.  If this song doesn't cheer you up, you have no soul.

1. Rainbow Factory (Wooden Toaster)

Though possibly overshadowed by the fanfic it inspired, this song is far more effective because it remains vague and mysterious.  It doesn’t implicate any character or contradict canon, so it could very well exist as a nameless fear in that universe.

2001 Movies Ranked

<< 2000    2002 >>

20. Pearl Harbor

D: Michael Bay

**********

Quite possibly the most insulting war movie I’ve ever seen.  Yet another Historical Love Triangle movie.  I’m usually not a stickler for fake accents, but Ben Afflecks Southern accent is beyond awful.  At least it produced a good soundtrack and this hilarious song.

19. Evolution

D: Ivan Reitman

**********

A really unfunny and crude comedy.

18. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

D: Kevin Smith

**********

Will Ferrell was the only enjoyable part of this spectacularly unfunny comedy.

17. Cats & Dogs

D: Lawrence Guterman

**********

When this came out I liked it just because it sided with the dogs, but now that I'm older I would like to see something more complex and ambiguous  It’s just a mediocre live-action talking animal movie.

16. Jurassic Park III

D: Joe Johnston

**********

Forgettable.

15. Enemy at the Gates

D: Jean-Jacques  Annaud

**********

The movie does a great job depicting the brutality of Stalinist Russia and has a great cameo by Krushchev (Bob Hoskins), but the story is ridiculous.  I’m tired of “historical” movies about love triangles.  The Battle of Stalingrad was interesting  enough without petty daytime talk show drama.  Also, I’m no fan of communism, but pointing out its failure to keep people out of love triangles is not a compelling argument against it. There’s also a ridiculous and utterly tacked-on sex scene.  In an insanely cheap move, the movie realizes that Ed Harris’ character is more sympathetic than any of the “heroes” and has him murder a child at the last second so we’d want to see him die.  The movie has a Moral Compromise Spectral Release Phantasmatron! 

14. Osmosis Jones

D: Tom Sito, Piet Kroon, The Farrelly Bros.

**********

Get it?  Chris Rock is a white blood cell?  You know…even though he’s actually black?  A sub-par Farrelly Bros. movie combined with a typically dated “hip” turn-of-the-century animated movie.  At least there are some amusing moments and some really good voice acting from Laurence Fishburne.


13. A.I. Artificial Intelligence

D: Steven Spielberg

**********

It’s visually arresting and has a promising premise, but it suffers from poor execution and a terrible ending.  I definitely admire Kubrick’s artfulness, but he apparently wasn’t particularly good at whimsy.

 

12. The Royal Tenenbaums

D: Wes Anderson

**********

I think Wes Anderson is hit-or-miss, and this is not one of my favorites.  I know that some people may accuse Arrested Development of ripping off the voiceover, but whereas that show uses it effectively for humor, Alec Baldwin’s soporific narration just seems more like lazy exposition.  It even ruins one punchline by giving it away at the beginning of the movie.  Also, I’ve seen funny narration used effectively before, like in Freakazoid!  I’m not sure why Ben Stiller’s character and his sons are constantly dressed in jogging suits; it’s more distracting than funny.  Maybe if it was some subtle act of defiance of the director when faced with a forced product placement, which would be funny, but I don’t know.  The movie has some interesting ideas, but I just didn't find it that funny.

11. Shallow Hal

D: The Farrelly Bros.

**********

It’s like a lesser version of The Nutty Professor but it does have some laughs and some effective emotional moments (Cadence's reveal is actually quite effective).

10. The Majestic

D: Frank Darabont

**********

I was really enjoying this movie until halfway through when it started becoming painfully predictable.  I could practically recite Jim Carrey’s final speech before it happened.

9. Suckers

D: Roger Nygard
**********
An interesting look at the inside world of car sales, but it unfortunately bogs itself down with cliched subplots of drug trafficking and loan sharks.

8. Harry Potter and the Sorceror’s Stone

D: Chris Columbus

**********

The first entry in this series is a little visually bland and childish, but it’s a decent family fantasy.  Fortunately, it would mature with its audience.

7. Amelie

D: Jean-Pierre Jeunet

**********

A charmingly imaginative and quirky romance.  Jeunet made some great-looking gold-hued movies, but this time he got lazy and clearly used digital color filtering, which does not look good with yellow.  As a result, the film’s style suffers.

6. Shrek

D: Andrew Adamson, Vicky Jenson

**********

This movie’s satirical tone was fresh when it came out, but now it’s been played out, leaving us wanting more sincere animated features.  However, it’s a fun movie, and the Harry Gregson-Williams score is excellent.

5. Monsters, Inc.

D: Pete Docter

**********

One of the better earlier Pixar movies.  Great characters and an imaginative setting.

4. Spirited Away

D: Hayao Miyazaki

**********

I don’t have much to say except that this is a great, imaginative movie.

3. Black Hawk Down

D: Ridley Scott

**********

Saving Private Ryan set a new standard for war movies, and this film does a great job following up without a contrived plot.  There are a couple moments that bug the shit out of me, though.  There’s one amazingly dramatic moment from the event revolving around the first confirmed American KIA.  Accounts refer to all this chaotic background chatter that made communications hard, but when that one guy says, “He’s dead”…DEAD SILENCE.  Despite being lucky enough to have this given to them on a silver platter, they still figured out away to fuck it up.  I also heard one account describing a Little Bird pilot flying his helicopter with one hand and shooting at people with an MP5 with another; I didn’t know how that didn’t make the cut.

2. Zoolander

D: Ben Stiller

**********

It’s got a some stupid jokes, and Ben Stiller’s mugging can get annoying, but the humorous plot and the abundance of hilarious jokes more than make up for it.

1. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings

D: Peter Jackson

**********

Not much I can say; this is a near-perfect fantasy film.

<< 2000   2002 >> 
Least Favorite Movies of 2001

2002 Movies Ranked

<< 2001    2003 >>

19. Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever

D: Wych Kaosayananda

**********

An amazingly clichéd action movie which is known for spawning a surprisingly decent game.  Has a rare 0% Rotten Tomatoes rating.  Some moments of action are good, but the characters are bland.  This film also has one of the most underwhelming attempts at a cool, gimmicky death I’ve ever seen.  One thing I particularly dislike is the sheer number of Caprices (I have a bit of a soft spot for these cars) that seem to get wrecked in order to make this waste of a movie.

18. National Lampoon’s Van Wilder

D: Walt Becker

**********

This pathetic attempt at a spiritual sequel to Animal House has an annoying protagonist and a climax that is more disgusting than genuinely humorous.

17. Star Trek: Nemesis

D: Stuart Baird

**********

The movie that broke the even/odd rule of Star Trek movies.  The CGI would have been considered bad in the mid-90’s, and it’s made worse by the fact that the space scenes are dominated by a putrid green hue.  The Scimitar is like something a child would have built out of Legos, both in appearance and concept.  The worst part of the movie is the ending, in which Data is replaced. 

16. Men in Black II

D: Barry Sonnenfeld

**********

Like T3, it depressingly retcons the previous movie’s happy ending.  Unlike T3, it’s not very fun.  The few funny moments don’t make up for all the awful attempts at humor.

15. The Sum of All Fears

D: Phil Alden Robinson

**********

As a fan of the Jack Ryan movies, I was looking forward to this, but it was very disappointing.  Ben Affleck is certainly no worthy successor to Harrison Ford, or even Alec Baldwin for that matter.

14. Die Another Day

D: Lee Tamahori

**********

A Bond movie so bad that it fortunately made the franchise reboot with Casino Royale.  It’s still got some good action, and I’d honestly rather watch it than the more dull entries in the series (eg: Thunderball]

13. Gangs of New York

D: Martin Scorsese

**********

I think Scorsese has a limited range as a director, and serious period pieces are not his forte.  This is probably because, while his movies are fun, he generally fails to create an emotional connection between me and the characters.  Also, it’s not one of Leonardo DiCaprio’s better performances.

12. Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones

D: George Lucas

**********

The prequels were problematic, but this is the one that I actually dislike.  I liked Obi-Wan and some of the action, but the story was a mess and it retconned logical fan deductions.  Anakin was whiny and half-psychotic.  Dialogue was forced.  The romance is the worst this side of Twilight.  The final act used too much grotesquely orange CGI.  I will, however, defend Hayden Christensen’s performance.  The terrible writing and direction were not his fault, and I’m not the first to point that out.

 

11. Resident Evil

D: Paul W.S. Anderson

**********

A mediocre film with some decent atmosphere and some good music.  I may not be all that familiar with the games, but I know bad movies.

10. Adaptation

D: Spike Jonze

**********

An oddly meta movie about a writer adapting a book and finding out that it’s real life story is not what it seems.

9. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

D: Chris Columbus

**********

The first sequel in the series is still kids’ stuff, but it’s an improvement over the first.

8. Spider-Man

D: Sam Raimi

**********

Despite the gaudy, dated CGI and that awful Green Goblin costume, this is an extremely definitive and well-cast adaptation of Spider-Man that really hits the mark.

7. Signs

D: M. Night Shyamalan

**********

Though everyone hates it now for its ludicrous story, it’s still a very well-directed thriller, and there’s just as much intentional laughs as there are accidental ones.

6. Minority Report

D: Steven Spielberg

**********

A fun sci-fi movie with a unique visual style.  My only complaint is the tacked-on feel-good ending.

5. Dog Soldiers

D: Neil Marshall

**********

A modern werewolf movie done right.  The character design on the werewolves is amazing despite the limited budget. 

4. The Cat Returns
D: Hiroyuki Moriti
**********
Possibly my favorite Studio Ghibli film, this movie is well animated, funny, charming, and has some great heartwarming moments.

3. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers

D: Peter Jackson

**********

A good escalation in the Lord of the Rings saga.  Like its predecessor, it’s a near-perfect movie. 

2. 28 Days Later…

D: Danny Boyle

**********

I’m generally not a big fan of the zombie subgenre, but this is an exception.  By adding atmospheric visuals, character development, effective cinematography and an excellent soundtrack, Danny Boyle made a thrilling and worthwhile zombie movie.

1. Equilibrium

D: Kurt Wimmer

*********

A movie that has about anything there is to want in a sci-fi/action movie.  My second favorite movie.

<< 2001   2003 >> 

2003 Movies Ranked

<< 2002    2004>>

20. Bulletproof Monk

D: Paul Hunter

**********

A mediocre movie with an awesome title and some good moments of action.  Offensively, the movie asserts that people running Holocaust remembrance museums are secretly Nazis!

19. S.W.A.T.

D: Clark Johnson

**********

A forgettable action movie.

18. Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle

D: McG

**********

A terrible and grotesquely overstylized action movie only worth watching for The Thin Man (Crispin Glover).  It also plays a pretty good song at one point.

17. Lost in Translation

D: Sofia Coppola

**********

This movie isn’t really bad, it’s just very boring and overrated.  I probably would have liked it more if it was a short film, but it had too much wordless, pointless filler.  I also would have been less disappointed if people had not gone around pretending it was a comedy when in reality it was a drama with some very, very mild comic relief.

16. Underworld

D: Len Wiseman

**********

A waste of a good premise and visuals.  The characters, with the possible exception of Lucian, were not compelling and the design for the “werewolves” was terrible.

15. Daredevil

D: Mark Steven Johnson

**********

Though visually stylish, it’s pretty much a low-quality rip-off of Batman (1989).

14. Bad Boys II

D: Michael Bay

**********

The movie has some good action (including an excellent car chase scene), but its vulgar sense of humor brings it down.  I might have been more prepared for the awfulness of “Transformers” if I had watched this movie beforehand.

13. Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

D: Jonathan Mostow

**********

Its great action and funny comic relief makes it like a good parody of T2, but it’s a bastardization of that great movie that retcons its optimistic, life-affirming ending for the sake of cynical profit.

12. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

D: Peter Jackson

**********

Has plenty of good moments, but its badly paced plot and overreliance on CGI prevents it from being truly great like the previous two entries in the series.

11. Old School

D: Todd Phillips

**********

Despite my the problems I have with the story, it’s still a funny movie.

10. Holes

D: Andrew Davis

**********

9. Shattered Glass

D: Billy Ray

**********

Hayden Christensen is an underrated actor who gets way too much crap for his appearance in the Star Wars prequels, whose shortcomings weren’t even his fault.  This movie is a solid account of the Stephen Glass scandal.  Peter Skarsgard is terrific.

8. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

D: Gore Verbinski

**********

A fun, lighthearted swashbuckler with an excellent score.  Johnny Depp’s Jack Sparrow may be a great character, but it’s annoying how Depp now only seems interested in playing him over and over. 

7. Kill Bill: Vol. 1

D: Quentin Tarantino

**********

A stylish and fun martial arts flick with a great sense of wit.  My only problem is that you don’t know when Tarantion is making new action moves up or whether he’s just ripping off choreography from some obscure be movie.

6. The Matrix Reloaded

D: The Wachowski Bros.

**********

Even though the protagonists aren’t very likable and there’s next to no pacing, the visual style and action of this movie are amazing.

5. Once Upon a Time in Mexico

D: Robert Rodriguez
**********
Overall, it's much more fun than Desperado, especially with Johnny Depp's character.

4. Big Fish

D: Tim Burton

**********

A good story about a son coming to terms with his father.  Arguably Burton’s last truly great film before he and Johnny Depp slipped into a downward spiral of self-parody.

3. The Matrix Revolutions

D: The Wachowski Bros.

**********

Despite having some awful dialogue, this movie has a well-placed story that increases the suspense and some excellent action scenes.  The Super Brawl is one of the most epic fights in movie history.

2. X2: X-Men United

D: Bryan Signer

**********

Though I didn’t like the first movie, this one is actually quite solid, and does an impressive job of putting an expanded cast in a coherent story.  I don't care for the title, though (how were the X-Men not united in the last movie?).

1. Goodbye, Lenin!

D: Wolfgang Becker

**********

A funny and poignant German film that went under most Americans’ radar while they were fawning over the bafflingly popular Lost in Translation.

<< 2002     2004 >>

2004 Movies Ranked

<< 2003      2005 >>

27. Fat Albert
D: Joel Zwick
**********
The guy who made me sit through this told me Best in Show wasn't funny, so I guess things have a way of working out.


26. Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy

D: Adam McKay

**********

Man, everybody likes this movie.  Hipsters, Jocks, Goths, my brothers, the pope.  Everyone except me.  I like absurd humor when it’s done well, but I find this movie’s humor to be a really forced version of that.  I’ll make a review in which I elaborate on my feelings. 

25. Tentacolino

D: Kim J. Ok

**********

A sequel to The Legend of Titanic.  That’s right a sequel to the animated Titanic movie.  The one that’s not the one with the rapping dog and is somehow worse.  Despite having some pretty scenery, it’s absurd and poorly paced.  The understandable motivations of the “villains” and the petty and sometimes sadistic tendencies of the “heroes” make it one of the worst-framed movies I’ve seen since 300.

24. Alien vs. Predator

D: Paul W.S. Anderson

**********

Some interesting design, but the movie was mostly defined by nonexistent characterization and horribly edited action.  When I saw this I thought it was one of the worst movies I had ever seen, but that was in a happier, more innocent time before AVP:R and “Transformers.”

23. Resident Evil: Apocalypse

D: Alexander Witt

**********

An aggressively bad vixen movie with fight scenes that are either painfully ripped-off or incoherent.  Also has an extremely bland villain.  PWSA delegated directing duties since he was busy with an even more underwhelming movie:

22. Troy

D: Wolfgang Petersen

**********

A bland and oversimplified version of The Iliad with all the mythology/interesting stuff cut out.  At one point Priam makes a speech about how thousands of people getting killed in war because of Paris’ selfish infatuation is somehow noble.  The only things I liked were Sean Bean as Odysseus (I’d like to see a faithful sequel starring him) and a cameo by Aeneas.  Watch Gladiator instead.

21.  The Dawn of the Dead

D: Zack Snyder

**********

I didn’t like the original, but I would probably dislike this remake more if I did.  All the B-movie charm of it is replaced by Zack Snyder’s tacky style, and the movie seems too much like a generic Hollywood blockbuster.  The movie also features one of the most idiotic actions ever done in a horror movie.  Some woman gets a whole bunch of people killed in an utterly moronic attempt to save a dog.  Even worse, the dog was clearly being ignored by the zombies and was in no immediate danger whatsoever.

20. Saw

D: James Wan

**********

A grungy, dark and violent movie about a serial killer with a twisted sense of justice who traps people and kills them in symbolically gimmicky ways.  Doesn’t sound familiar at all.  The twist ending is so insulting that it makes me wonder why anyone took this movie seriously.  I didn’t see the sequels because I learned my lesson, but I hear they at least deliver on the gore.

19. Van Helsing
D: Stephen Sommers
**********
Hackish, boring action movie, but at least it boasts some good werewolf design.

18. Shark Tale

D: Vicky Jenson, Bibo Bergeron, Rob Letterman

**********

This spiritual sequel to Antz has atrocious character design, terrible fish puns and cheap pop cultural references.  The presence of Robert DeNiro and Martin Scorsese playing lame self-parodies only makes it worse.  Frustratingly, the movie does have a good amount of funny moments that prevent me from completely writing it off.  At least DreamWorks learned not to make movies about animals with human faces after this.  It also has a decidedly inaccurate likeness of the Titanic’s wreck.  

17. Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story

D: Rawson Marshall Thurber

**********

The only part of this movie I remember being funny was David Hasselhoff’s cameo, and Jason Bateman's memetic line.

16. A Christmas Carol: The Musical
D: Arther Allan Seidelman
**********
Kelsey Grammer's and Alan Menken's adaptation is bogged down by some tedious songs, but elevated by some good ones.

15. Shrek 2
D: Andrew Adamson, Kelly Asbury, Conrad Vernon
**********
It does sacrifice some plot for laughs, but unlike the subsequent sequels, it actually works.  Jennifer Saunders does a really good version "Holding Out for a Hero"


14. Sideways

D: Alexander Payne

**********

I love Paul Giamatti, and this is a pretty good little comedy.  I hate Merlot, too.

13. Kung Fu Hustle

D: Stephen Chow

**********

An extremely funny live-action cartoon.

12. I, Robot
D: Alex Proyas
**********
It lacks some of Proyas' visual style and a lot of people didn't like how it used the Aasimov title, but it's still a pretty solid movie.

11. Hellboy

D: Guillermo del Toro

**********

Good visual style and witty banter.  Ron Perlman is perfectly cast as Hellboy.

10. The Bourne Supremacy

D: Paul Greengrass

**********

Best.  Car chase.  Ever.

9. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

D: Michel Gondry

**********

An imaginative and visually creative film.  Though Jim Carrey takes some heat for it, I like it when he does more subdued performances. 

8. Shaun of the Dead

D: Edgar Wright

**********

An excellent zom-com.  Could’ve done without the swipe at 28 Days Later, though; I believe that movie to be a vast improvement over the zombie movies this comedy affectionately spoofs.

7. The Passion of the Christ

D: Mel Gibson

**********

A good depiction of the Crucifixion.

6. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

D: Alfonso Cuaron

**********

After a lackluster beginning under Chris Columbus, the series grows up fast with an atmospheric movie.  The time-turner is a pesky plothole, but the style and suspense more than make up for that.

5. Spider-Man 2

D: Sam Raimi

**********

Peter Parker’s struggles with his responsibilities as a superhero are what make this a great example of the genre, and Dr. Octopus is a great tragic villain.  I usually find it cheap and hackneyed when a hero loses his powers to appear more “vulnerable,” but they make it work here by linking it with a subconscious desire not to be a hero, which makes it identifiable.

4. The Incredibles

D: Brad Bird

**********

This movie raised the bar for quality at Pixar.  In fact, outside Toy Story, I don’t think the company consistently made truly great movies until it made this one.

3. The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou

D: Wes Anderson

**********

Everybody seems to look for deep meaning in Anderson's movie, but I like them because they're funny and visually stylish.  This is why I'm in the minority of people who think this is one his strongest works.  It’s just as underrated as Bottle Rocket is overrated.

2. Comic Book: The Movie

D: Mark Hamill

**********

Although accused of being a rip-off of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, even though it was incalculably funnier than that thing, and its humor and style have more in common with that of a Christopher Guest movie.  It’s not like Kevin Smith was complaining; he was in this movie.  Jim Cummings is also hilarious in his only live-action role.

1. Team America: World Police

D: Trey Parker

**********

Gut-wrenchingly hilarious satire of the War on Terror with great songs, fun action, and over-the-top sex (all involving puppets).  The question posed in the song "Pearl Harbor Sucks and I Miss You" ("Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?") makes even more sense now in light of the Transformers series.  

<< 2003       2005 >>