1989 Movies Ranked

<< 1988    1990 >>

Well, now we're in the 80's.  The time of great sci-fi movies and comedies.  Technically before my time, but I still have a lot of nostalgia for the movies and cartoons from this period, partially because my brothers watched them.




13. License to Kill
D: John Glen
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An early and unsuccessful attempt to take Bond seriously.

12. All Dogs Go to Heaven

1989

D: Don Bluth

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Don’t get me wrong, I love Don Bluth when he’s at the top of his game.  He was a huge influence on my tastes.  Secret of NIMH and Land Before Time, two of my favorite animated movies, were criminally underrated and they’re a standard by which others should be judged.  ADGtH is to Don Bluth what Signs was to M. Night Shyamalan; it had the director’s stylistic strengths, but it’s where things started to get stupid.  It boasted excellent animation, Don Bluth nightmare fuel, a likable protagonist and a good premise.  I won’t deny the movie’s strengths as a potential masterpiece (Nostalgia Chick does a great positive review of it)  Unfortunately, its tone was ruined by idiotic scenes like the laser attack, the Big-Lipped Alligator Moment and some terrible songs (and yet Don Bluth fans think Titan AE is a terrible movie for some reason).  I don’t know what extent to which this was forced on Bluth, but it wrecks the film for me.

11. The Killer

D: John Woo

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Overall it’s okay, but the iconic church gunfight is what makes it worth a look.

10. Black Rain

D: Ridley Scott

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It’s enjoyable enough for Ridley Scott’s amazing cinematography.  It looks like Blade Runner without the actual cyberpunk elements.  Despite the visuals, it’s pretty much a rigidly formulaic cowboy cop movie that kinda drags on.

9. Uncle Buck

D: John Hughes

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John Candy is great as the loutish uncle with a heart.

8. Henry V

D: Kenneth Branagh

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A great adaptation of a great play.

7. Turner & Hooch

D: Roger Spottiswoode

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A classic Tom Hanks comedy with a messy dog.  One of the few dog comedies that works.

6. The Little Mermaid

D: Ron Clements, John Musker

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The movie has its flaws.  In the words of the Nostalgia Chick, “I sold my soul for a vagina and a man who doesn’t know me.”  Still, I find it very nostalgic and entertaining.  It has a great villain, and some great songs.

5. Back to the Future Part II

D: Robert Zemeckis

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The visual treatment of the future is cheesy (particularly the wardrobe), but the time-travel-driven storyline is still great

4. Glory

D: Edward Zwick

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Overall, pretty well-made period piece with some good pathos.

3. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade

D: Steven Spielberg

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Probably the most nostalgic of all the Indy movies for me, but it’s been supplanted by Raiders of the Lost Ark.


3. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

D: Jeremiah Chechik

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One of the funniest Christmas movies ever.

2. Lonesome Dove

D: Simon Wincer

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One of my favorite westerns.  I love the chemistry between Tommy Lee Jones and Robert Duvall is great.

1. Batman

D: Tim Burton

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I still prefer this over the Nolan movies, partially because it treats Batman as a mysterious character.  Lots of fun, with a healthy balance between darkness and camp.  Danny Elfman’s excellent score has become the iconic theme for Batman.  While I agree that Heath Ledger has dethroned  Jack Nicholson as the Joker, Michael Keaton is still the king of the live-action Batmans.

<< 1988     1990 >> 

1990 Movies Ranked

<< 1989   1991 >>

15. Die Hard 2: Die Harder

D: Renny Harlin

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I stand by my belief that this is the most underwhelming of the series, and that includes A Good Day to Die Hard, which at least has a great chase scene to show for it.  And don’t get me started about the ceramic Glocks…

14. Troll 2

D: Claudio Fragasso

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Best Bad Movie, which is an informative documentary about Troll 2, seems to confirm that the motivations behind making this movie were indeed horribly earnest.  This is odd, because it doesn’t really seem like a genuinely bad movie so much as intentionally funny camp in the vein of Army of Darkness and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.  There are so many moments in this movie that have to be intentional jokes.  It’s just inconceivable to me that they’re not.  Oh, well.   

13. Goodfellas

D: Martin Scorsese

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It’s a good movie that has some memorable moments, but it just doesn’t do much for me.  I think that sums up my opinion of most of Scorsese’s movies.  Also, I think movies about Italian mafia members’ being conflicted is a bit of a dead horse, and The Godfather already explored the subject with more style and pathos.

12. RoboCop 2

D: Irvin Kershner

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Its ham-fisted satire lacks the naturally tongue-in-cheek tone of the original, and its story isn’t very good, but I like this movie for its violence and cyberpunk visuals.  Still, it’s hard to believe Kershner went from Empire Strikes Back to this.

11. The Rescuers Down Under

D: Hendel Butoy, Mike Gabriel

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A visually-striking and entertaining cartoon.

10. Memphis Belle

D: Michael Caton-Jones

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An overlooked war movie that’s actually pretty good.

9. Home Alone

D: Chris Columbus

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Don’t deny it.  If you’re my age, you are nostalgic for this movie.  This always came on TV on Thanksgiving, and you just had to watch it.

8. It

D: Tommy Lee Wallace

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It has some Stephen King cheesiness, but I like how it’s about different characters and how they deal with a monster in their youth and adulthood.

7. Miller's Crossing
D: The Coen Bros.
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A unique take on the organized crime genre.

6. Total Recall

D: Paul Verhoeven

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A fun sci-fi movie with some really funny, clever moments.  The crappy remake makes me appreciate it even more.

5. Back to the Future Part III

D: Robert Zemeckis

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Another good Back to the Future movie.

4. The Hunt for Red October

D: John McTiernan

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Atmospheric and fun action movie, although the book is better.

3. Kindergarten Cop

D: Ivan Reitman

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One of Arnold’s funniest performances. 

2. Misery

D: Rob Reiner

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One of the better Stephen King adaptations.  Kathy Bates is excellent.

1. Edward Scissorhands

D: Tim Burton

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A perfect modern fairy tale from the master.  Has a great score, too.

<< 1989  1991 >> 

1991 Movies Ranked

<< 1990    1992 >>

Well, we're back into a new era of cinema.  Well, "we" as in me and the imaginary leprechauns who actually read this blog.  I have to say that the era of great sci-fi movies ended this year with T2.  Then there was a sci-fi slump that didn't end until The Matrix came out.  The sci-fi movies during the 90's that were good were largely comedic in nature and didn't really have much atmosphere.

14. Rock-a-Doodle

D: Don Bluth

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Definitely Don Bluth’s worst movie.  It somehow combines the insanity of a stubborn artist with the oblivious hackishness of executive meddling.  The latter is particularly evident with the use of a small child as a protagonist and the fact that the movie is constantly hyperactive and never gives the viewer a break.  It’s frustrating to see a movie this awful coming from a formerly great animator.

13. The Christmas Tree

D: Flamarion Ferreira

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The popular comparison that this is animation’s answer to The Room is quite apt.  An unremarkable premise made hilariously bad by inhumanly bad execution.  Terrible writing, voice acting and animation.  You can watch it, if you dare.

12. Child’s Play 3

D: Jack Bender

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Not as memorably violent as the previous installments.  In fact, the only good part I remember is Chucky’s getting half his face cut off near the end.

11. The Rocketeer
D: Joe Johnston
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A solid, overlooked nostalgic classic.


10. Delicatessen

D: Jean-Pierre Jeunet, Marc Caro

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A quirky post-apocalyptic film in the spirit of Terry Gilliam

9. Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

D: Kevin Reynolds

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This movie is unpopular (partially due to the miscasting of Kevin Costner as Robin Hood), but it’s a fun movie.  Alan Rickman’s Sheriff is a classically evil and funny villain.

8. Hot Shots!

D: Jim Abrahams

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One of my favorite spoof movies of all time.  The only worthwhile performance by Charlie Sheen (aside from his recent real life breakdown).  A great parody of Top Gun, a movie I actually find rather overrated.

7. Hook

D: Steven Spielberg

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This looked terrible on paper, but I loved it when I finally got a chance to see it.  When I was a kid, it was a tough sell, being a live-action version of Peter Pan.  Then again it isn't a straight Disney remake.

6. Point Break

D: Kathryn Bigelow

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I love this movie.  I love the cheesiness of it.  I love Keanu Reeves’ unintentional hilarity.  I love Gary Busey’s craziness.  It also has a pretty good footchase.  It's definitely not a great movie from an objective standpoint, but it's hilariously cheesy and succeeds at being fun when it tries.

5. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

D: Nicholas Meyer

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Great characterizations, great special effects, a great score.  Nicholas Meyer not only directed the best Star Trek movie, he also made the second best with Undiscovered Country.  Still, I don’t really know what the villains thought they were going to accomplish with their scheme.

3. Beauty and the Beast

D: Gary Trousdale, Kirk Wise

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Internet critics see this as heads and shoulders above the other Disney movies of the era.  I now see why.  The message of this movie is that the ability to see oneself as a villain is important to the capacity to be good.  Funny how the Academy made the ghetto award for animated movies shortly after nominating this for Best Picture so they wouldn’t make that “mistake” again.

2. The Silence of the Lambs

D: Jonathan Demme

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Thrilling and creepy classic.  Anthony Hopkins is amazing as Hannibal Lecter.

1. Terminator 2: Judgment Day

D: James Cameron

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One the most groundbreaking and entertaining action movies ever made.  It’s too bad James Cameron hasn’t made a great movie since.  It does have a lot of logical inconsistencies and annoyances, but it's the quintessential movie that everyone forgives just because of its awesomeness.

<< 1990   1992 >>
 Least Favorite Movies of 1991

1992 Movies Ranked

<< 1991    1993 >>

18. Toys

D: Barry Levinson

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It has some good humor, but its obnoxious story and message of “war toys are bad” ruin it.

17. FernGully: The Last Rainforest

D: Bill Kroyer

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Preachy and dull movie that has a great villain song.

16. Aces: Iron Eagle III

D: John Glen

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An absurd action movie in which drug trouble out at a WWII air show.  The day is decided by people dogfighting in obsolete aircraft, and a Scaled Composites ARES is passed off as a “Messerschmitt 263” (Get it? It’s like 262+1).  It’s described as “the plane that would have won the war for Germany” as if Germany’s problems could have been solved by a new plane in 1945.  Also, for some reason the air show uses paintball rounds in its performances.

15. Freddie as F.R.O.7

D: Jon Acevski

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An all-out assault on logic.  So bad it’s good.

14. Bram Stoker’s Dracula

D: Francis Ford Coppola

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Visually arresting, well-acted (with the exception of Keanu Reeves) and almost faithful to the novel, this movie would have been excellent if they had not shipped Mina with Dracula.  The yiff scene didn’t exactly help either.

13. Alien³

D: David Fincher

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Good visuals and atmosphere don’t make up for the slow pacing and the depressing retcon of the previous movie’s ending.  However, unlike T3, it didn't pretend we could have fun after doing that; it respected our subjectivity.

12. Aladdin

D: Ron Clements, John Musker

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It’s not a bad cartoon and it has some very good songs, but it doesn’t do that much for me.  I guess that I’m not too big a fan of Jafar, and the villain goes a long way in these Disney movies.  Also, Robin Williams’ pop cultural references don’t help.

11. Under Siege

D: Andrew Davis

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Overall, the movie’s not that good, but Gary Busey and Tommy Lee Jones make it enjoyable.

10. Unforgiven

D: Clint Eastwood

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Clint Eastwood apparently wanted this to be some type of anti-gun screed, but it kind of backfired.  Seeing as how the villain is a corrupt, gun-grabbing tyrant, and the problems of the movie come from his abuses, I don’t see it.  Still, a well-made, gritty Western.

9. The Muppet Christmas Carol
D: Brian Henson
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A fun and humorous adaptation that stays faithful while adding the charm of the Muppets.  Some good music, too.

8. A Few Good Men

D: Rob Reiner

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Memorable characters and some good lines.  I like Tom Cruise’s cynical character because I was in the Navy and I didn’t like it one little bit.

7. Patriot Games

D: Phillip Noyce

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The best of the Jack Ryan movies.  Very thrilling and suspenseful actioner with a unique atmosphere.  Harrison Ford is perfectly cast as Ryan, and Sean Bean is one of my favorite actors.

6. Dead Alive

D: Peter Jackson

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Army of Darkness is my favorite horror comedy, but this could be the runner-up.  The memorably over-the-top violence and humor make this a zomedy classic.

5. The Last of the Mohicans

D: Michael Mann

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An excellent period piece that avoids the noble savage fallacy.

4. Hard Boiled

D: John Woo

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Chow Yun-fat’s charisma helped, but it’s the phenomenal action sequences that make this one of the best shoot’em ups ever.  It’s too bad I haven’t seen a truly worthwhile movie from Woo since he started filming for America.  My advice is to ignore that junk (with the exception of Hard Target and maybe Face/Off) and just watch his Hong Kong stuff.

3. Porco Rosso

D: Hayao Miyazaki

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A very imaginative and fun movie with a likable protagonist.  My favorite Miyazaki movie.

2. Batman Returns

D: Tim Burton

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I can’t give it too much credit because of how poorly executed the Penguin’s character is, but I still love it.  The visual style is Tim Burton at his best, the chemistry between Batman and Catwoman is good and the movie has a lot of humor.  Danny Elfman does a great job with the score, making a good leitmotif for Catwoman and a very poignant one for the Penguin.  I'm more charitable about it now since I care less about faithfulness to the source material.

1. Evil Dead III: The Army of Darkness
D: Sam Raimi
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The best horror comedy ever.

<< 1991   1993 >>