Grindhouse
2007
D: Quentin Tarantino, Robert Rodriguez, et al.
**********
Pros: Great Grindhouse Style, Well-Executed Violence
Cons: Two Individually Flawed Movies
Quentin
Tarantinio and Robert Rodriguez have always been avid fans of trashy 70’s
B-Movies, and Grindhouse represents
their ultimate love letter to them. It’s
a double feature with a full-length movie by each director with vintage
animated bumpers and various fake trailers contributed by some guest filmmakers
Edgar Wright, Eli Roth, and Rob Zombie.
The double feature consistently uses low-budget practical effects, heavy
gore, and intentionally worn picture quality.
Both features
earn their R-Rating through copious amounts of violence, but the sex scenes are
edited out through fake “missing reel” segments. This is bad if you’re a horndog with no sense
of humor. It also could be interpreted
as a commentary on the double standard between depiction of sex vs. violence in
movies.
The features in order are:
1. FAKE TRAILER- MACHETE
D: Robert Rodriguez
Starring Danny Trejo as an action hero. Rodriguez wrote the movie in 1993, and the
fake trailer later motivated him to make the full feature in 2010. The trailer stars Cheech Marin and Jeff
Fahey.
2. FEATURE – PLANET
TERROR
Planet Terror
D: Robert Rodriguez
**********
Pros: Well-Done violence, Grindhouse Style, Humor
Cons: Depressing Child Death, One Unlikeable Heroine
With this
zombie spoof, Robert Rodriguez pulls out all the stops. The violence is over-the-top, with gory body
explosions and the biggest blood squibs I’ve seen until Django Unchained. Unlike
most of these midnight movies, it keeps the action going. Special effects are mostly practical, except
for well-done CGI on Cherry Darling’s (Rose McGowan) M-16 leg. I was wondering how they pulled that off,
considering the directors’ bias for practical effects. Sometimes that kind of misdirection is the best
kind of effect. Humor is more campy than
witty, and the style is more exaggerated than it is in Death Proof, with an even scratchier picture and a stereotypical
film burnout (for all I know it could be what that actually looks like, I’ve
never seen one). The missing reel
humorously cuts straight to a third-act battle scene, skipping many important
plot points. Planet Terror has a memorable score made by Rodriguez and Graeme
Revelle, and stars Stacey Ferguson, Quentin Tarantino, and Tom Savini.
The movie
stars Rose McGowan as Cherry Darling, a go-go dancer whose leg is ripped off by
a zombie and replaced with an M-16. She
and the heroic Earl Wray (Freddy Rodriguez) fight off a zombie plague triggered
by the release of a chemical caused by Dr. Abbington (Naveen Andrews) and an
elite military group led by Lt. Muldoon (Bruce Willis). The chemical spreads across the area, forcing
the heroes to escape form a bar owned by JT Hague (Jeff Fahey) and his sheriff
brother (Michael Biehn). The movie is
action-packed, funny, and stylish.
The one thing
that ruins the movie’s quality, reducing it to a mere guilty pleasure, is the
character arc involving Dr. Dakota Block (Marley Shelton). Married to Dr. William Block (Josh Brolin),
she’s been cheating on him with other women.
We’re supposed to automatically dislike the cuckholded husband, and
Dakota’s father Texas Ranger Earl McGraw (Michael Parks) always disapproved of
their marriage, knowing he was a bad man.
However, Dr. Block doesn’t really do anything wrong until the moment he
attacks Dakota halfway through the film. As if Dakota wasn’t unsympathetic enough, she
later irresponsibly hands her young child (Rebel Rodriguez) a gun to shoot at
any attacker while she leaves him alone.
Unfortunately, the boy almost immediately shoots himself, and that’s
where the movie loses me. I guess I draw
this line at children, and I hate it when people can’t tell the difference
between dark humor and depressing garbage.
If there was any character I wanted to see get hers, it was Dakota, but
she frustratingly survives the movie.
3. FAKE TRAILER – WEREWOLF
WOMEN OF THE SS
D: Rob Zombie
A parody of Nazisplotation movies starring Udo Kier,
Sheri Zombie, Andrew “Test” Martin, Oleg Prudius, and (hilariously) Nicolas Cage
as Fu Manchu.
4. FAKE TRAILER - THANKSGIVING
D: Eli Roth
Feeling that Thanksgiving was an underrepresented holiday
in the slasher genre, Eli Roth made this (the slasher is dressed up like a
pilgrim). It almost got Grindhouse an NC-17. It stars Jordan Ladd, Michael Biehn, Jay
Hernandez, and Roth himself. Mary
Elizabeth Winstead stars as a cheerleader played by her character in Death Proof.
5. FAKE TRAILER – DON’T
D: Edgar Wright
An affectionate parody of American trailers for Hammer
Horror films. The cast (which
includes Jason Isaacs, Simon Pegg, and
Nick Frost) are never shown speaking, and a narration is provided by Will
Arnett.
6. FEATURE – DEATH PROOF
D: Quentin Tarantino
**********
Pros: Grindhouse Atmosphere, Well-Executed Violence,
Witty Dialogue, Good Cast, Clever Premise
Cons: Resolution Partially Ruined by Unlikeable
Protagonists
A clever twist on the slasher genre in which the killer
uses a death-proofed car to kill women, a premise which speaks of Tarantino’s
love for old-style car effects. It uses
a wittier, more restrained style than Planet Terror, and it stays more faithful
to old grindhouse features. It takes a
while to build up, but when the payoff occurs, it’s quite satisfying. The car chase at the end is great, but the
morally reprehensible act of setting up their friend for rape renders the
heroines less sympathetic, and the movie’s resolution suffers for it.
7. FAKE TRAILER – HOBO
WITH A SHOTGUN (CANADIAN RELEASE)
D: Jason Eisener
Later made into a full-length movie starring Rutger Hauer
as as the hobo.
The two
feature films take different approaches.
Planet Terror is more
exaggerated and action-packed, while Death Proof is more akin to a wittier version of a real grindhouse movie. The double feature benefits from the variety
in my opinion. They both clearly take
place in the same universe, with Planet
Terror’s coming after Death Proof
in continuity, but before it in the movie’s runtime. Both movies are enjoyable, but each suffer
from one fatal, frustrating flaw.
However, since Grindhouse is
an experience in itself, the features’ individual quality can be forgiven, thus
allowing me to call the Double Feature masterpiece.
DVD REVIEW
Grindhouse Double
Feature
Pros: The Entire Double Feature on One Disc
Cons: Lacks Extra Footage from Uncut Versions
I was really upset when I found out that Grindhouse was not initially going to be
released as the Double Feature we saw it as in the theatres. No vintage bumpers, no fake trailers, just
the movies. I was also afraid that the
humorous “missing reels” would be removed, robbing the films of their
humor. Fortunately, they finally came
around and released the version they should have released in the first
place. The first disc is the entire
double feature, trailers and all on one side of one disc (apparently not a
given for long movies). The movie comes
with English and French tracks a commentary for Planet Terror. Death Proof’s lack of commentary is not
surprising considering the creator backlash it got. The second disc is chock full of goodies like
behind the scenes features and an extra fake trailer.
QUOTES
[Crying after
losing her leg]
CHERRY DARLING: Look at me! I was going to be a stand-up comedian! Who’s gonna laugh now?
EARL WRAY: Some of the best jokes are about
cripples. Come on.
CHERRY DARLING: Name's Cherry Darling...
EARL WRAY: Sounds like a stripper name.
CHERRY DARLING: No, it sounds like a go-go dancer name.
There's a difference.
DR. FELIX: Viral infections. They came pouring in. Some
are rapidly developing coliform leisions... highly contagious. What do you
think?
DR. BLOCK: Self-preservation comes to mind.
[From Werewolf
Women of the SS trailer]
NARRATOR: Featuring Udo Kier, Sheri Moon Zombie, Tom
Towles, Sybil Danning, Bill Moseley, and Nicolas Cage…as…Fu Manchu.
NICHOLAS CAGE AS FU MANCHU: This is my Mecca!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
[From the Thanksgiving
trailer]
DEPUTY: [tasting blood from decapitated body] It’s blood.
SHERIFF: Son of a bitch!
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